Entry: HOW WARS START Jun 23, 2005





MSN CHAT BETWEEN ME AND A CO-WORKER THIS AFTERNOON

Garreth says:

I'm telling you, if Tommy Hilfigger launches "Pantaloons, by Tommy Hilfigger", everyone will start using the full word, not the informal 'pants'...but maybe guys like us don't want that. Maybe it's an indy word for only us to use...?

tim at work says:

pantaloons is the indy word? or pants?

Garreth says:

well...pantaloons is honestly indy but I guess 400 yrs ago it was the main word and some enterprising young hipster shortened it to pants. 

tim at work says:

yeah quakers and pioneers were using that word like it was going out of style, man. they were dropping that shit like it be hot.

Garreth says:

hell yeah. One of them, I think the guy who founded Quaker Oats, tried to say "Man, I spilled ketchup on my 'loons! Fuck." but everyone laughed at him. They were like "'Loons'? What the fuck are you talking about, do you mean Pants? Haha, you're such a dufus."

tim at work says:

and he was like "Yo, check out my dope porridge over here. That's shit's a bag o' chips, word".

Garreth says:

That's totally what he said. That brings up a good point, use of the term 'Porridge' over 'Oatmeal' divided the country for centuries dude. MILLIONS did without breakfast. Millions

tim at work says:

i think that's how the muthafuckin' civil war started, actually. it was a geographical thing.

tim at work says:

buddy from the south was brewing up some "oatmeal" in his chuckwagon, and he came upon homeboy from the north who was mixing up a similar batch of "porridge" and the two looked at each other and were like "Uh-uh, not in my muthafuckin' house you don".

Garreth says:

haha. Yeah. you had it right when you said geography...The Yankees were like "we're the north" the confederates we're like "The fuck you are. The earth is a round ball dude, how the fuck do you figgure you're 'north' of us if there really is no top or bottom. We're fucking north, you're under us, but the other way." The yankees we're like "No." and then they fought.

tim at work says:

and i distinctly remember that one of the teams had a fucking trebuchet while the other crew had a bunch of catapults, and the trebuchet guys were going "how fucking dare they rip off our trebuchet design and call it some other stupid-ass name! and look at them wearing fucking pants and eating porridge! this shit is whack!"

Garreth says:

For real guy. You know "Trebuchet's" and "Pantaloons" have way more cache then "catapults" and "pants" ...but in truth 'Porridge' sounds way classier than 'Oatmeal'

tim at work says:

i'm sitting here right now trying to explain this conversation to chris and it's not coming out too well

Garreth says:

not surprised. you have to be retarded like me and slightly deranged like you to get it.


   2 comments

tim and kerri
July 1, 2005   01:46 PM PDT
 
we are old enough to know better.
Alfa
June 24, 2005   11:49 AM PDT
 
funny shit
how old r u guys?

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